Guest Story by Barbara
As a 58 year old dark skinned African American woman, I have always felt the discrimination, dislike, distane, humiliation, rejection and isolation in all of my 58 years. Although I have achieved a level of success in my life, I am well aware that the reasons I’m still a single black female, is due to not only my skin color, but also because, I don’t possess the “European features” that most men desire. There is also a strong level of dislike within the African American communities. The level of violence is a symptom of self-hatred.
At an early age, I was always called the most derogatory terms any child should endure. My mother was shades lighter then me and even though I know my Mom loved me, I even heard it from her lips that I was “Black and Ugly”! This dislike for the darker complexed society has also crept in to the church. I am also a born-again Christian and have experienced some of the most disapproval from those who are suppose to portrait the true Love of God and Love unconditionally, only to experience that the church which is suppose to be a refuge for many hurting people, would turn out to be just the opposite of what God would expect from those who call God their own.
Dating is very unlikely for me and most of my brown skinned friends and marriage seems out of the question. I ended a freindship with a very good person because when we would go out she would always get the attention from black men although she was a Puerto-Rican woman and they would not give me the time of day. I know there are many factors in communicating with people and being attractive enough for any attention, but I know for a fact that most black men prefer the light skinned women over the darker women. I have a sister who is the lightest in the family and she is never without a date. Where as if I get even a look from a black man it is usually always never.
As a matter of fact I have had caucasian men trying to get with me, and I have absoulutely no interest in the other culture. Years ago, I wanted to write abook about my experiences, but have never set down and put the thoughts to pen. Thanks Mr. Duke for bringing this subject to the forefront and I will donate towards the movie being produced. One last stereotype that I think even I had about us dark girls is that we seemed to be the most vocal, rowdy, loud and angry. I thought that too, but there are some of us dark girls who speak with a soft voice, we are not loud, don’t curse, not rowdy and we are educated and we take care, nurture and love our black families and men.
The Dark Girls Movie- Rise Women Rise Campaign seeks to share their stories of healing, empowerment, and triumph. We know this issue goes beyond the United States and Black people. This is for ALL women from around the world. If you have a written story or video, please submit here.